The Heart of the Human Problem — The Problem of the Human Heart

After the Fall, Adam and Eve formed predictions based on their fears.

The strategies they adopted were not consciously thought through, but were predictive adaptations meant to respond to the threat they now perceived towards them.

We have seen that they applied in three main ways:

- Withholders fear being defective and hide to avoid exposure.

- Chasers fear being alone and over-function to avoid abandonment.

- Wrestlers fear being abandoned and swing between intimacy and withdrawal.

God promises to address the issue with our IOS by giving us a "new heart."

But what does this mean?

It doesn't mean that our hearts are swapped out, like getting totally new hardware.

Our hearts are relationally programmed. God reprograms our hearts through a relationship—Expressed through the New Covenant. We heal in the presence of love.

The Withholder fears being defective.

Garden Root: Adam and Eve hide from God in shame. "I was afraid… so I hid" (Genesis 3:10).

"If people saw the real me, they would reject me."

God’s Remedy: Acceptance—We have been made acceptable in the beloved!

Through Christ we have been made:

- Entirely acceptable, 

- Acceptable apart from anything we do, 

- Unchangeably accepted, 

- accepted regardless of anything you do. 

- Accepted, even when we sin. 

Acceptance = Being witnessed accurately and embraced non-judgmentally, despite our behaviour.

It involves three ingredients:

1. Being known (observed without judgment)

2. Being understood as good (given the benefit of the doubt)

3. Being embraced (appreciated for who you are)